By Lillyana Rivera

Trigger Warning: Starvation, religion

We pray for nine days straight

This is tradition

Salutations to the saints

I am praying to eat
I am praying for the Lord to take this hunger out of me

Novenas –
historically,
originated
out of mourning

town square gone to cry together

I am praying to La Virgen for
mazapán
Or maybe i’m praying for Aztlán

We harvest
We work
We commune and repent
And i am so sorry,
lo siento,
lo siento,

my mother says as she feeds me corn and the last of the beans
and at night the hunger invades my dreams

saltillo tile stains my knees
my little sister says it hurts to breathe

ashes to ashes
blood to soil
nursing baby tucked in my mother’s rebozo

stuck chewing on a rosary

flee
into the arms of the saints

Guadalupe
I am praying to you

Mother of Mexicans
I am praying to you
For some goddamn food

–

Lillyana Rivera is a nineteen-year-old writer from Southeast Alaska and Washington state. She currently splits her time between the University of Washington and Port Angeles. When she’s not writing, she can usually be found listening to Ethel Cain, reading novels on the kitchen floor, or hanging out at the beach.